hie ..!!! long time le hor ... erm ... not long la ... few days onli ... anyway , i will not upfdate daily but weeky , possible ^_^

hmm ..... i regretted last yr slacking soooo much T-T ... now too mani tings to do !!!! ahh !!!! but i still slacking .. haha ... dun noe wat the hell i'm tinking ....

anyway i dun wan to tok bout today la ....

ok .. .for hw many months i neva go eat fast food le .... today i went with cat, lingxuan , dora then we ...... blahblah .... ......

erm ... bout my title : attitude change , mainly is towards my parents ....

i discovered that i'm not that guai liao .... keep saying the opp. tings tat my parents say .... i dun noe wat happen to me .... but i dun feel like following their way or maybe i shld put it like tat , i dun like doing tings for them ... everytime i do tings for them , i will sure do sumting wrong thent hey will sure scold me ....

see ... even now i rite my blog oso against them .... i tink i'm " pan ni " le lei ..... how ahh ??? i try to solve tins prob but i can't !!!! i can't do it !!!! i keep telling myself .... i dun noe la !!!!! i will atuo becum like tat when i speak to them , do tings for them .... i dun noe wat happen to myself !!!!! i tried to be guai but .... i can't accept the tings they wan mi to do .... they keep nagging and nagging !!!! i noe they wan mi gd .... but realli veri irritated la !!!! i already stressed up with the time i hav now and then they r like making more stress up with tis prob !!!! T-T .... mani ppl say i becum pan ni le lei ... hw arr ??? even Lim oso say that !!!!

SIAO ... maybe is the way i tink :
- i tried to talk to them .... but everit ime i see them , i dun feel like even toking bout my sch lif e to them hw am i goin to tak to them eith tis kind of prob ???!!!

[everytime ppl called mi to tok to them !!!! i hate it when they do tat !!!! they will rite under comments :' u can try toking to them ' .... Eng teach , chinese teach ..... why they alll like tat de !!!! but do u ppl noe hw diff is it to do that !!!! maybe i feel that if i tel them bout these , they get hurt and get more angry then thigns get worst then my ma will start crying again saying : whatever she wanna say !!! do u tink that i neva try it ??? i tried !!! but after a few sentence she will start sayign hw we grow up , hw hard she bring us up .... I NOE I NOE !!!! I NOE U BRING US UP !!! BUT NOW WHO IS THE ONE SPEAKING !!!! WHO IS THE ONE WHO IS SAD AT FIRST !!!!WHO IS THE ONE WHO CAME TO U AND TOK !!!! WHY CAN'T U JUX LISTEN !!!! DUN GIVE ANY COMMENTS OPPOSITING ME .... JUX GIVE ME TOK !!!! AND GOT ANYTING TO SAY , TML THEN SAY AND SAY IT IN A NICE WAY !!!! THEN MAYBE I WILL CHANGE BACK .... why can't they jux do that ?? *sobsob*]

- no one understand my life not even my sis ....

- no one will noe my life bcux i can't tell anyone !!! i dun feel comfrotable toking to them ... cox they are close to my parents .... even if they swear they wouldn't tell ... i will still feel uncomfortable ... i wan a person wu i can trust alot ... or not related to me in blood .... like my frens ... but they seem to be like jux frens they always cuts in sumting when i wan to tok bout all tis .....
i jux need one person i'm close with , not in blood but close like frens .... wu would realli listen to me ... and jus listen finish wat i say ...... and jus let me cry .... hope that i can find one ....

- i feel that i realli need time !!!! TIME !!!
[soo stop nagging ard me !!! i noe wat to do with my studies !!!! do u tink that i'm STUPID or sumting like tat !!!!]

maybe u will say i hav the tings i wan ..... erm ... i said before bout bks ... cox its related to study and our future soo she buy for us .... tats all i can say .... and oso .... hp is oso the one ting that i buy usign my results ....

dsic man and everyting : i forgot le but comfrim is frm results
cd : pricless ... all frm pocket money , myself ...
price for results: $150
hp price : $98

for lingxuan , i noe u say before that even hw gd u get ur parents will not award with u anyting .... i agree that ur statues is ... err .... but at least u hav a sis who is at ur side .... my sis ..... dun tok bout her la ... she herself already can't independent le .... she dun even care for me , MOST of the time ....

frm today onwrads , i swear to myself i will try my damn best to study !!!! and i will get gd results ....


**note**
sorrie if i hurt sumone in this post k .... i jux wan to tok bout my views .... i hav no mning of hurting anyone k .... soo dun take it in mind plz ... SORRIE